Act 1
Scene 1
Enter the hero - a schoolboy Sam, aged 16 in his uniform along with his girlfriend Sophie.
SAM; Just a year more and I'm outta here! I can't take this anymore! I'm sick of uniforms!
SOPHIE nods
SOPHIE; It bugs me too! I have such a huge collection of dresses
I can’t wear coz' of this stupid uniform
SAM; Soon it will all be over. I just can't wait to get into college.
I'm gonna just freak out! Go wild!
SOPHIE; Yeah, I'm sure (laughs)
SAM; I have it all worked out!
SOPHIE; Yeah, yeah, yeah!
SAM; I am planning to take BA in politics
SOPHIE; What? Are you nuts?
SAM; Naaah, Babe, I know what I am doing!
SOPHIE; How come you're not doing IT?
SAM; Everybody's doing IT! Besides you need to be good at logic!
SOPHIE; Everything needs logic
SAM; I've found that in Politics, you don't need it
SOPHIE; What do you mean?
SAM; Just look around. Look at our Laloo. He runs railways and makes it so profitable.
Any logic there? They are studying his methods in business schools now.
SOPHIE; Are you serious? You mean you are going ahead with your hare-brained scheme?
SAM; Scheme is the right word you used, alright. Strategy is more apt for what I had in mind.
SOPHIE; What strategy?
SAM; Stage 1 - Off the people
SOPHIE; Now what the heck is that? I thought it was "of the people"
SAM; This is my strategy - I need resources, money, people, liquor, vehicles, publicity - lots of it. I need to take it “off the people”
SOPHIE; How?
SAM; Donations for my party. You scratch my back and I scratch yours when I am in power.
SOPHIE; You mean people will give you money just like that
SAM; Not just like that. They know I am a potential candidate. Who knows, I may even rise up to become a minister before 30. For them it's investment.
SOPHIE; And then?
SAM; Then the next stage is "for the people"
During that stage I will make promises. I need to first divide the haves from the have-nots.
The haves don't count coz' they won't vote. And even if they do, they won't vote for me.
SOPHIE; That's true. Knowing you, I wouldn't vote for you
SAM; Who needs your vote? Besides I am pretty sure that you will not vote.
SOPHIE; And then, what's your next step?
SAM; Buy the people
I mean pay for their expenses, their travel, their booze, everything. I must get them to come here and vote for me.
SOPHIE; That's it? They'll come and vote?
SAM; Not just for that, alright
They need promises. And they need comforts. Colour TV. Gas. Blankets. Bed-sheets. Houses. Cars. Whatever.
SOPHIE; You mean "empty" promises?
SAM; That's how it works! Ours is a democracy. Besides you can always take from Peter to pay Paul.
SOPHIE; You have it all worked out, eh?
SAM; To a certain extent, yes.
But I must consult my Guruji first.
SOPHIE; So what about studies? BA Politics?
SAM; I am confused about that. It might be a disqualification if I complete it.
I must take advice regarding that.
SOPHIE; Ok, fine, let’s assume you do all that. And you have power, fame everything. Then what next?
SAM; I’ll go international. Look at the United States. They have a Bush for Prez.
Don’t you think that I’ll do a better job any day?
China is right next door, but no scope there! I like democracies.
(Dedicated to Santosh and Sophie, for inspiring me to write my first play)
Close
pBs
Politics or fake godman or both like the latest god man Amrithachaythanya scandal in Kerala??
Good one, this.
LM
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